My Church of Hot Addiction

Dude really

Fri, 27 Mar 2009 21:20:24 GMT

God, i'm so very fucking w/e tired of being the one who have to give everything up.
Sure, i want to meet her again, but she can't decide it 16 hours before she's gonna be here.
Just, no
I already have plans
And i kinda don't know

Thu, 12 Mar 2009 18:34:16 GMT

I guess i don't take bad things too well
Like the fact that my birthday will officially suck since my oh so awesome boyfriend can't come up that weekend
Cus he spent all his money on booze.

I just, i don't know, i just feel so stupid, i'm fucking crying, for the second time today

I'm sorry guys, i suck.

Til next catastrophe, take care

I can't live, i can't breath. Unless you do this with me.

Sun, 01 Feb 2009 19:37:25 GMT

It's true, i'm so scared of losing him.
But i say the wrong things, i don't think the same way he does about some things.
I'm so sick and tired of a few things, like him.
I just want him to be okay with what i think and do.
Just as i'm okay with his chooses.

I want to read between you're lines

Thu, 08 Jan 2009 18:38:45 GMT

You piss me off baby
You piss me off

I don't understand how you work
Why you do what you do
Why i even HOPED

I mean
You clearly don't like me as much as i do
You're clearly not as afraid as i am

Fuck you

IDK

Mon, 15 Dec 2008 19:41:10 GMT

I don't know anything anymore
The controlfreak in me is dying
I fuck up, and i don't even know why
I want to help him more than anything
I don't want anything to happen when i'm gone and can't fix it
I just want to be home
I just want to be with him
I kinda want the other guy
I can't live without my baby

Tue, 02 Dec 2008 10:17:28 GMT

Oh god, i haven't updated in like, so long.
I haven't been on livejournal either.
It's really because i don't need to anymore, right now i have other places to write about how i feel.

Okay so, update. I got a boyfriend. He's the best thing in the world but at the same time he drives me nuts.
Right now i'm sick but i have to go to school and fix a few things.
My life is good actually. My biggest problems are that i don't really know if i wanna go to the US next year and study. I mean, i'm head over heels in love. But at the same time, i'm just 16. I'm not that in love with him to not go.

Well, now it'll probably be like, half a year before i update again. Have a nice life

Thu, 02 Oct 2008 20:11:37 GMT

Jag bryr mig inte
Visst, det känns somom jag ska spy
Men det känns endå ganska skönt
Jag behöver inte ljuga om hur mkt jag tycker om honom
Another broken heart, check

Sat, 27 Sep 2008 07:01:54 GMT

I'm sorry for not commenting and for not updating and whatnot.

Whatever, life's good right now, a bit heartbreaking in some parts but i'll manage

Love you guys <3

Thu, 04 Sep 2008 20:30:45 GMT

Euh, things seems to never work out.
I'm always one of the boys, they even said so.
I don't really want to eat, but i do anyway, otherwise everyone will get annoying.

A shout out to everyone who have cared, i love you guys loads. Never ever leave me.

I need a place where i don't need to bend over backwards to feel good about myself. Where i can just be me

Fri, 29 Aug 2008 15:48:43 GMT

So, i'm having boy problems (surprising, i know)
The first one is a boy who i've never met but who's hitting pretty hard on me. The thing is, he's STUNNING but he's a bitch. I want to meet him but i don't think it would end in much else than heartache when he moves on to the next girl.

Boy number two is a kid from my new class, he's not hot at all but i like him a lot as a friend. The thing is that i'm VERY clingy with my friends and i'm afraid that i've given him the wrong impression.

Boy number three is another kid from my class. A kid who i'm in love with. The problem here is that he has a girlfriend, but even though that he's flirting a lot with me. He smiles to me in class and he asks for blowjobs pretty often, classy, i know.
It's just, i practically MELT when he smiles to me. I look at him in class when i'm bored. I'm so darn in love and it's just really fucked up.

The last boy is a friend of mine who just got dumped by his first girlfriend and now i believe he's falling a bit in love with me. It's just so annoying because i LOVE being able to talk to him about everything and now i just can't because i feel like such a bitch when i start talking about what adorable (or other) things boy # 3 did today.

So, now i need your help, what should i do?

Wed, 06 Aug 2008 15:28:15 GMT

I'm losing control
I knew
Now i really don't

Best thing on youtube <333

Sat, 02 Aug 2008 20:11:37 GMT

HAHAHAH, awesome

Sat, 02 Aug 2008 19:15:11 GMT

Damn, why can't i just play it cool?

I'm learning how to keep a boy, i suck tbh

Sat, 02 Aug 2008 18:28:53 GMT

Why do you sing to everybody but me? Why do I let it go on?
You've got such a music box song in my head all day long.
You fell for a girl with wild eyes, dressed in satin and lace.
She's just an empty diamond mine with moan across her face.

I can love you much better
If you can't see it you're blind
I can love you much better
And you know someday I'm going to make you mine.

You are the daydream in my eyes, there whenever I wake up
But the colors never crystallize and I never get enough
And while you kiss everybody but me, I just sit back and watch
But one day soon, I'm gonna grab you by the collar
and kiss you all I want!

I can love you much better
If you can't see it you're blind
I can love you much better
And you know someday, I'm gonna make you mine.

I can love you much better
I can love you all right.
I can love you much better
And you know someday, I'm gonna make you mine.

Take that, idiot

Tue, 29 Jul 2008 11:25:31 GMT

http://hongkongaton.livejournal.com/264121.html , this dear f-list is awesome and just what i needed today.

Mon, 28 Jul 2008 21:49:22 GMT

Why do people think i'm stupid?
Do i look stupid or something?
Is it the way i act?

Maybe i shouldn't have said what i said
Being easy makes me more forgettable
I just feel so empty when i look at you
Like i said, i want what she has
I'm getting worn out of wearing a smile
When your smile is only to her
I'm sick of you calling me cute and then kiss her
I want what i had, so long ago
I want someone to be real with me
I guess i don't really care
But damn it stings like hell when i see you
When i see her
When you try

Fuck the world, i don't want to just live once, i wanna live twice so i know what's bad and what's good

I need to start making limits

Fri, 25 Jul 2008 14:42:53 GMT

I have to be a bit bi-polar
I don't know why it has started happening right now
But i want stuff and when i get it i just freak out and fuck it over
I don't trust myself anymore

Fuck

I'm confused

Thu, 24 Jul 2008 20:37:29 GMT

I can't just lie there
I'm writing songs about you, that you'll never know about
I can't be still
I want what she has
Just to fuck it over
I want my life to stop fucking me over
I'm gonna stop getting my hopes up

I'm okay really, that's why this is so odd

HAHAHAHAH

Mon, 14 Jul 2008 02:33:04 GMT

These two weeks i've been watching WAAAY too much Hannah Montana and Camp rock, i'm gonna miss it when i get home

WE ROCK, WE ROCK, WE ROCK

Oh my god >.<

Also, i'm pretty stupid, like, we were driving down Oli road and my sister is like ''Didn't we drive on Oli road just two hours ago?'' and i say, without thinking, ''No, that was Sykes street'' (I promise, it was the true names of the streets!) and my family kind of went ''O.o '' becuase you know, they don't listen to BMTH

I also laught LOUD at Joe Jonas Purity ring and white pants (If you don't know why, i'll tell you) throught whole camp rock.

Peace out <3

The book thing

Wed, 25 Jun 2008 10:52:22 GMT

Taken from sateenmusta
The Big Read reckons that the average adult has only read 6 of the top 100 books they've printed. Well let's see.

1) Look at the list and bold those you have read.
2) Italicize those you intend to read.
3) Underline the books you LOVE.
4) Reprint this list in your own LJ so we can try and track down these people who've read 6 and force books upon them ;-)

1 Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen
2 The Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien
3 Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte
4 Harry Potter series - JK Rowling
5 To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee
6 The Bible
7 Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte
8 Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell
9 His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman
10 Great Expectations - Charles Dickens
11 Little Women - Louisa M Alcott
12 Tess of the D'Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy
13 Catch 22 - Joseph Heller
14 Complete Works of Shakespeare
15 Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier
16 The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien
17 Birdsong - Sebastian Faulks
18 Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger
19 The Time Traveler's Wife - Audrey Niffenegger
20 Middlemarch - George Eliot
21 Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell
22 The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald
23 Bleak House - Charles Dickens
24 War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy
25 The Hitch Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams
26 Brideshead Revisited - Evelyn Waugh
27 Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky
28 Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck
29 Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll
30 The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame
31 Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy
32 David Copperfield - Charles Dickens
33 Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis
34 Emma - Jane Austen
35 Persuasion - Jane Austen
36 The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe - CS Lewis
37 The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini
38 Captain Corelli's Mandolin - Louis De Bernieres
39 Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden
40 Winnie the Pooh - AA Milne
41 Animal Farm - George Orwell
42 The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown
43 One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
44 A Prayer for Owen Meany - John Irving
45 The Woman in White - Wilkie Collins
46 Anne of Green Gables - LM Montgomery
47 Far From The Madding Crowd - Thomas Hardy
48 The Handmaid's Tale - Margaret Atwood
49 Lord of the Flies - William Golding
50 Atonement - Ian McEwan
51 Life of Pi - Yann Martel
52 Dune - Frank Herbert
53 Cold Comfort Farm - Stella Gibbons
54 Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen
55 A Suitable Boy - Vikram Seth
56 The Shadow of the Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon
57 A Tale Of Two Cities - Charles Dickens
58 Brave New World - Aldous Huxley
59 The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time - Mark Haddon
60 Love In The Time Of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
61 Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck
62 Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov
63 The Secret History - Donna Tartt
64 The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold
65 Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas
66 On The Road - Jack Kerouac
67 Jude the Obscure - Thomas Hardy
68 Bridget Jones's Diary - Helen Fielding
69 Midnight's Children - Salman Rushdie
70 Moby Dick - Herman Melville
71 Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens
72 Dracula - Bram Stoker
73 The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett
74 Notes From A Small Island - Bill Bryson
75 Ulysses - James Joyce
76 The Bell Jar - Sylvia Plath
77 Swallows and Amazons - Arthur Ransome
78 Germinal - Emile Zola
79 Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackeray
80 Possession - AS Byatt
81 A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens
82 Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell
83 The Color Purple - Alice Walker
84 The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro
85 Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert
86 A Fine Balance - Rohinton Mistry
87 Charlotte's Web - EB White
88 The Five People You Meet In Heaven - Mitch Albom
89 Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
90 The Faraway Tree Collection - Enid Blyton
91 Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad
92 The Little Prince - Antoine De Saint-Exupery
93 The Wasp Factory - Iain Banks
94 Watership Down - Richard Adams
95 A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole
96 A Town Like Alice - Nevil Shute
97 The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas
98 Hamlet - William Shakespeare
99 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl
100 Les Miserables - Victor Hugo

17 :D I'm smart

Mon, 23 Jun 2008 22:00:52 GMT

I feel okay, i feel empty but okay.

Summer has been kinda boring so far but i'm going to US on friday and i'll be gone for a month so it'll be fine.

I want to fall in love again (Stupid i know) because damn i liked it before he broke my heart.

I'm selling myself cheap

i just want to feel loved, you know?

I've been in love once, the shiny sort of love

i still love him, but more as a friend and i'm very fond of him.

I'm really okay, but feeling like i should be out there, doing things

And really, why has my life so far been like a bad soap?
Like, i get love, some odd thing happens and we fall out.
I'm getting happy some stupid plot twist strikes in.
Let's just hope it ends like the most soaps and that i'm the heroine of it

I'll be your safe ride home when you call me, i'll be your everything and more

Tue, 17 Jun 2008 21:17:21 GMT

Some people are wonderful, some should just die

I want to travel somewhere alone, perhaps go and visit my ex.

I'm getting scared and i feel a bit alone

I'm cynical of this whole love thing

I should sleep but i don't

I miss a lot of people right now, but i just want to be alone

I want to fall in love too

He was a disaster

I'm not, anymore

We lost everything we ever had and ever would have a chance to get

Practice makes perfect, practice makes perfect sense to me

Over and out

Slow motion, watch me let go

Wed, 11 Jun 2008 09:51:09 GMT

Sucky weather today which means i can't fix my fail tan of failyness.

I'm gonna get married to my friend this saturday, she's really really awesome and i'm gonna buy her a plastic ring :D
The boy who crushed my heart is going to be there which is great too, because i need to see him again and sort my feelings out. ( And maybe steal him back just to fuck him over, i'm a revenge ridden kid)
(What's worse is that a girl who's hitting on me is going to be there, and she's just plainly creepy)

I HAVE BLUEBERRY MUFFINS :DDDDDD

Over and out

Trust me and everything i do

Mon, 02 Jun 2008 20:01:52 GMT

* I don't know if HE wants me, because he don't want to have just one girl at a time and he don't like relationships.
* I'm sooo damn tired
* The prom is tomorrow, and i don't know how to have my hair and what make up to wear.
* I'm getting a cold, AGAIN
* I think i fucked EVEYTHING up yesterday
* He has at least one more girl who's in ''love'' with him, and i think she's way prettier than i'll ever be.

* He told me he liked me more than just a friend
* My friends are awesome
* I'm gonna be really pretty for prom
* Kid Down are awesome
* I had a manicure today, so my nails are very pretty and pale pink <3

Ibland asså, undrar jag vad som är fel på mig. Jag undrar också om han ljuger och fejkar sig. Om han gör det, varför? För att ha ett hångel utan känslor eller för att dissa mig på ett snällt sätt.
Jag vet inget längre och mitt hjärta/hjärna åker bergochdal bana.
Why do i ALWAYS fall for the idiots.

Jag älskar er som hjälpte, bara genom att ni lyssnade, för jag behöver få det ur mig. Annars kommer jag explodera

Haha, he IS in love with her.

Don't you mind the war tonight, we watch the sky explode in light

Sun, 01 Jun 2008 07:41:10 GMT

Och vad i helvete var det där?!

DU KAN JU FÖR FAN INTE GÖRA SÅ FÖRSTÅR DU VÄLL

OM DU FÖRST I EN JÄVLA VECKA BERÄTTAR FÖR MIG HUR MYCKET DU GILLAR MIG OCH SEN NÄR VI TRÄFFAS HÅNGLAR MED MIG KAN DU JU FAN INTE MITT I ALLT SÄGA ATT DU SKA TRÄFFA EN JÄTTE SÖT TJEJ IMORN!

ASSÅ VAD I HELVET, DU FÅR VÄLL FAN BESTÄMMA DIG INNAN JAG FÅR FÖR MIG ATT ''Hey, jag kanske kan LITA på den här personen, han kanske GILLAR mig?!''

DU ÄR EN SÅN JÄVLA IDIOT OCH JAG SKA FAN KROSSA DIG PÅ MITT SÄTT.

FAN